The first stanza in Michael Jackson’s Man in the Mirror says:
“I’m Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
It’s Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .”
Interestingly enough, as I begin this project I’m physically doing the opposite of what the following chorus of that song says.
I can NOT look at myself in the mirror for the duration of one week – and depending on how I feel about the whole situation at the end of a week’s time, I may consider continuing this little project.
Today marks day one and before my first class of the day ever started, I noticed a few things:
From the time I wake up to the time that my first class begins I have 18 opportunities to look at myself in a mirror or reflective surface – 3 mirrors in my bedroom (2 of them make up the entire north wall of my room), 1 in my bathroom, 3 in the living room/kitchen area, 2 in the entry way, 3 in the car, 6 different windows on campus.
Prior to committing to this project, I hadn’t even realized that it was part of my daily routine to look at myself in all of these surfaces at least once in the morning. How vain, right?!
From the get-go, avoiding my image in the mirrors made me feel terrible about myself. Not only did it reveal to me the vanity that I unknowingly clung to every morning but also, avoiding my face and image made me feel like I was ashamed of myself.
I’ve always been very content with myself and my image and so avoiding those things that I took pride in made me really uncomfortable. It made me feel as if I thought I was unworthy of being looked at. As if I couldn’t bear to look at myself instead of the reality of the situation that I WON’T look at myself. I’m not sure I’ve really explained that correctly but I hope you’re still following with me here.
As the day has gone on though, I think I am now more mentally prepared and I have oriented my mind so that I understand this isn’t some sort of punishment. It’s an opportunity to shift my focus off of the self and onto other things.
I’ll be updating as the week progresses. Fingers crossed I can make it through the whole week!
***Another little bonus fact is that there are 22 reflective suraces or mirrors in the boathouse that I often use – and I’m in the boathouse for nearly 5 hours every day! The struggle is real.
Idea from this blog: http://www.ayearwithoutmirrors.com/